  
My Bloody Valentine 3-Da.k.a. “My Bloody Valentine 3D”MPAA Rating:
 for graphic brutal horror violence and grisly images throughout, some strong sexuality, graphic nudity and language.Reviewed by: Brian Johnson Extremely Offensive
Moviemaking Quality:
Primary Audience:
Adults
Genre:
Thriller, Horror, 3D
Length:
1 hr. 41 min.
Year of Release:
2009
USA Release:
January 16, 2009 (wide—2,300 theaters)
DVD: May 19, 2009  
Relevant Issues
Every time you buy a movie ticket or rent a video you are casting a vote telling Hollywood “That’s what I want.” Why does Hollywood continue to promote immoral programming? Are YOU part of the problem? VIOLENCE—How does viewing violence in movies affect families? Answer NUDITY—Why are humans supposed to wear clothes? Answer How can I deal with temptations? Answer Should I save sex for marriage? Answer How far is too far? What are the guidelines for dating relationships? Answer What are the consequences of sexual immorality? Answer 
“Get your heart broken.” To all you would be horror movie producers who are thinking of remaking a cult classic—just don’t do it. Let’s leave well enough alone, shall we! Joining recent remade flops such as “Psycho” and “The Texas Chainsaw Massacre,” Lionsgate’s “My Bloody Valentine” limps into the never-should-have-been-rereleased pile. There is a simple message to future filmmakers, just because you can remake a film, does not mean that you should. “My Bloody Valentine” is a remake of the 1981 film of the same title; the story lines are similar, with a few new twists. Tom Hanniger (Jensen Ackles) returns to his hometown exactly ten years after a Valentine’s Day massacre which left 22 people dead at the hands of Harry Warden, a mine worker who spent months in a coma after an explosion at the mine. Hanniger returns to sell his father’s mine, which makes him public enemy #1; it doesn’t help that the killing has started all over again—making him prime suspect #1. One thing can be said about this remake—it fits well within the slasher flick genre. Unnecessary nudity, bad language, men and women falling for no reason while running, characters moving toward the killer instead of running away, or, running away while the killer walks and somehow he still manages to catch up—oh, and the biggest connection of all—horribly bad acting! Yup, it fits the conventions well. Patrick Lussier (director) brings considerable talent and experience to this debacle; he has worked on numerous films in the genre; many of them were box office failures. In theatres, the film is offered in 2D and 3D; ordinarily three dimensional movies are exciting, and slasher 3D may be treat for the avid fan, but all the computerized trickery in the world could not save this snoozefest. For comparison purposes, this writer saw the 2D version first and hoped that the fancy 3D technology could offer some level of redemption, but alas there was no help for this one. The tagline for this film is “Get your heart broken.” Exactly! Movies in this genre tend not to be Christ-centric or family-friendly; there is very little that makes this a film that Christians should go see. Honestly, non-Christians should avoid it as well. This film was released early (was originally set to open near Valentine’s Day 2009), due to the release of another classic remake—“Friday the 13th,” which will open on Friday, February 13th. Oddly enough, the word “fear” comes to mind; the concern is not the subject matter, but the idea that this classic will be butchered also causes this writer to shudder. Violence: Heavy / Profanity: Heavy / Sex/Nudity: Heavy Every time you buy a movie ticket or rent a video you are casting a vote telling Hollywood “That’s what I want.” Why does Hollywood continue to promote immoral programming? Are YOU part of the problem? See list of Relevant Issues—questions-and-answers.   Comments below:
Positive
Positive - I admit. I wanted to see this because of the man, the legend, Dean Winchester. AKA Jensen Ackles of the CW's “Supernatural.” He's a bad dude, as that's what Thursday nights at 9 eastern have shown me time and time again. After all, Dean's the stochiometric amalgamation of James Dean and Bond. All the rebel of the former and all the caustic wit of the latter. A contemporary Han Solo. Positive - To base it on a christian standpoint, it is extremely offensive. That would be freedom of choice to watch it or not. My family has been raised on scary films and so have both myself and my husband. They are cool to watch—graphics are wicked to say the least. WE loved the movie. I am not to keen on the 3D stuff—should have just left the movie the way it was originally done the first time. Negative
Negative - 3-d was the only chance for “My Bloody Valentine” at making any money at the box office. Otherwise it was just another axe in the head with blood squirting everywhere movie. The plot was terrible. It was a trashy hurried project with female nudity thrown in for the audience showing full breast nudity and vulva exposure for, I’m not joking, ten minutes. Why are the NC-17 and triple X ratings the new R? Sign of the times. Negative - I am a huge fan of horror fans and am a shmuck for remakes, just to see the new vision. I did not see the first “My Bloody Valentine” however, though I heard it was very, very much less violent and less offensive. This movies is terrible is two distinctive ways; 1) It is horribly made AND 2) It is extremely offensive. There is a scene of nudity that lasts almost 15 minutes, and only exists to see nudity. Just this aspect was pushing the R-Rating. |
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